A New Name

i've been thinking for awhile about changing the name of my blog. i named my blog on the fly...sam helped me set it up and then said, "what do you want the name to be" i hadn't thought at all...so just threw it out "thoughts on life" and never liked it...i know, its probably not a big deal...but i decided it was time for a change.

it all started when i was in Kolkata. i thought, "if i come back on staff i'd change my blog name to "This Beautiful Mess"" and then the more i thought of it...i realized that i don't need to live in kolkata to have the new name.

maybe it doesn't need any explaining - but i'll share my thoughts anyway. in Kolkata (and when i say "kolkata" i mean the place in general - society, culture...but also my friends' lives.) the dual nature of life is so clear to see. In the darkness, light (even a pin-prick) shines brighter. In despair, hope is more powerful. In bondage, hope is all we have. In the midst of all the need, provision is so powerful. In kolkata i saw very clearly that this world is a mess. broken. fallen. so far from what God ordained it to be. people are hurting, oppressed, beat down - the image of God is stolen and abused. at times its paralyzing, overwhelming - too much. but in the midst of the mess, God is at work. faithful. full. providing. freeing. loving. redeeming. God calls the people of kolkata beautiful. Kolkata is a beautiful mess.

and while i first "realized" all this - or acknowledged it in kolkata..it's just as true here in my own heart. I am a mess. i am broken. i am less than God's desire for me. sometimes my actions bring death, and not life. sometimes my mouth speaks words of bondage, not hope. sometimes my attitude is disgraceful. sometimes i'm a part of the problem. sometimes my heart is hard - and selfish, and prideful and judgemental. i'm a mess - and yet, miraculously, the God of love calls me beautiful. He pursues me. He takes me back again. He still chooses to accept my meager offering of my life, days, hours, moments. He calls me to be a part of His story of redemption, and the sharing of hope! He calls me beautiful. i am a beautiful mess.

and the same is true of my society and culture. spring arbor. and jackson. michigan...and america. this world is a mess...but God is actively bringing wholeness, health and redemption. and freedom. He longs to bring freedom here, just like in kolkata. His Spirit is at work through His people...and in the midst of the mess, there is beauty. jackson is a beautiful mess.

so, maybe it's a reminder to me of my own heart and journey. maybe a way to cling to hope. a reminder of how God sees me and my culture and the world...you can't deny that this world is a mess...just look around - but i need to remember God's view of the world. His love. His longing to redeem. His declaration of beauty. so...here's to This Beautiful Mess.