at the end of January our community went on a retreat in Thailand.
it was a gift.
the end of a long month.
the end of a long season.
sweet time with Scott and Beth...and with Brooke and Beth and Sarah.
great conversation
great food.
i got to play with my frisbee and with my ball that bounces on the water (thanks Brooke and Sarah!)
i realized early on in the time that besides the meetings and intentional conversations that we were going to have i wouldn't be having any deep meaningful breakthroughs on the retreat.
i wasn't going to journal.
i wasn't going to read books "learning books" and be challenged or refreshed.
i wasn't going to unpack the month that preceeded my time in Thailand.
i was going to sit on the beach and read my "Backpacker Magazine"
i needed a vacation.
i knew i also needed to "unpack" some losses that happened in November/December/January...but that's not where i was yet...first i just needed to rest...knowing that eventually i'd get around to the emotional and spiritual work that need to be done....but first things first...a deep breath...rest.
...and on Friday that "unpacking" began...
it began with realizing that there is...
some grieving that still needs to be done.
some losses that still need to be named
some tears that still need to be cried
now that that season is really behind me i can begin to look back into it...no longer needing to keep moving forward get through it...i can evaluate the goodness, and the gifts from the past few months...and i can also begin to grieve what needs to be grieved...name the losses...sit with some of them...
...and i get to do all these things with my community...
ahhhhhhh...yes.
it was a gift.
the end of a long month.
the end of a long season.
sweet time with Scott and Beth...and with Brooke and Beth and Sarah.
great conversation
great food.
i got to play with my frisbee and with my ball that bounces on the water (thanks Brooke and Sarah!)
i realized early on in the time that besides the meetings and intentional conversations that we were going to have i wouldn't be having any deep meaningful breakthroughs on the retreat.
i wasn't going to journal.
i wasn't going to read books "learning books" and be challenged or refreshed.
i wasn't going to unpack the month that preceeded my time in Thailand.
i was going to sit on the beach and read my "Backpacker Magazine"
i needed a vacation.
i knew i also needed to "unpack" some losses that happened in November/December/January...but that's not where i was yet...first i just needed to rest...knowing that eventually i'd get around to the emotional and spiritual work that need to be done....but first things first...a deep breath...rest.
...and on Friday that "unpacking" began...
it began with realizing that there is...
some grieving that still needs to be done.
some losses that still need to be named
some tears that still need to be cried
now that that season is really behind me i can begin to look back into it...no longer needing to keep moving forward get through it...i can evaluate the goodness, and the gifts from the past few months...and i can also begin to grieve what needs to be grieved...name the losses...sit with some of them...
...and i get to do all these things with my community...
ahhhhhhh...yes.
2 comments:
takes a lot of wisdom to do things at the appropriate time! resting and grieving both.
praying for you!
So your friends Scott and Beth are at a different conference in Chiang Mai, but my city leaders from Changchun are friends with them and were meeting them for coffee so they planned to pick up the gift and bring it to me. I was sad I wouldn't meet your friends, BUT then, as Chip and I were walking to dinner we ran into Scott and Beth with our city leaders. So I got to meet them. They seemed like great people! And they are going to drop off the gift at our hotel tomorrow. So fun! Thanks, Mel.
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