This weekend we had a staff retreat at a hotel in town. A friend of our community came and facilitated the time for us. i cannot put into words how timely, beautiful, and restorative this retreat was.
we talked through a personality assessment (the enneagram if you're really interested) - sharing what we resonated with in the descriptions of our "numbers" - our strengths and weaknesses - what we see to be true in ourselves - and then we had opportunity to speak life and truth into one another, and then to pray over one another (i continue to be amazed by how easy it is to believe the lies about ourselves...to highlight worst in myself - a gloss over the best parts of me). it was a gift to have truth, grace and affirmation spoken over me, as well as to have the opportunity to speak those things over my sisters.
in addition to the beautiful time we had together as a community it was also deeply restorative for me individually. As a community we have have discerned that we need to take a break from work/the city every three months. we've seen that if we don't we become tired and and overwhelmed - generally unhealthy. yesterday afternoon i looked back at the calendar and realized that i have been in town for 3 months (the last month and a half being especially stressful)...suddenly it makes much more sense to me why my margins were so thin, why i was so tired, why i have felt like i was hanging on by a thread. The weekend away gave my heart the space that it needed to let down, to be still and to receive from the Lord. This morning as i sat in my room preparing to return back to normal life i realized how peace had moved into my heart in ways that were beyond my imagination 2 days ago. and while i know that the madness of the calendar for the next 2 months, the new work responsibilities etc are all just waiting for me on the other side of tomorrow morning - there is a shift in my heart and a return of peace that assures me i will be fine. i will continue to be sustained. i will be held.
so then last night - quite randomly we ended up having an incredible dance party. i love to dance. i don't claim to be good at it...but i do love to dance. the hotel where we stayed had a dance club that was all but empty...had a ridiculous mountain scenery painted over the 4 large screen tvs, flashing red and green lights and strobe lights...and not awesome music...but the dance floor was empty...and i felt safe (often on the streets and in crowds i feel like i always have to be "on guard" observing my surroundings, preparing to respond to them - the empty dance floor was none of those things!) - and we danced and danced...and we were silly...and we had fun and we celebrated. it was a great end to the night...a memory i will cherish for a long long time. you see, one of the things i learned about myself in the personality assessment is that it's important for me to create space and time to play...and last night, with some women who i think are absolutely amazing...and who love me fiercely and deeply i got to play and laugh and dance and celebrate.
it was unexpected.
it was unplanned.
it was beautiful.
it is a memory that i will tuck away in my heart and mind for a long long time...
we talked through a personality assessment (the enneagram if you're really interested) - sharing what we resonated with in the descriptions of our "numbers" - our strengths and weaknesses - what we see to be true in ourselves - and then we had opportunity to speak life and truth into one another, and then to pray over one another (i continue to be amazed by how easy it is to believe the lies about ourselves...to highlight worst in myself - a gloss over the best parts of me). it was a gift to have truth, grace and affirmation spoken over me, as well as to have the opportunity to speak those things over my sisters.
in addition to the beautiful time we had together as a community it was also deeply restorative for me individually. As a community we have have discerned that we need to take a break from work/the city every three months. we've seen that if we don't we become tired and and overwhelmed - generally unhealthy. yesterday afternoon i looked back at the calendar and realized that i have been in town for 3 months (the last month and a half being especially stressful)...suddenly it makes much more sense to me why my margins were so thin, why i was so tired, why i have felt like i was hanging on by a thread. The weekend away gave my heart the space that it needed to let down, to be still and to receive from the Lord. This morning as i sat in my room preparing to return back to normal life i realized how peace had moved into my heart in ways that were beyond my imagination 2 days ago. and while i know that the madness of the calendar for the next 2 months, the new work responsibilities etc are all just waiting for me on the other side of tomorrow morning - there is a shift in my heart and a return of peace that assures me i will be fine. i will continue to be sustained. i will be held.
so then last night - quite randomly we ended up having an incredible dance party. i love to dance. i don't claim to be good at it...but i do love to dance. the hotel where we stayed had a dance club that was all but empty...had a ridiculous mountain scenery painted over the 4 large screen tvs, flashing red and green lights and strobe lights...and not awesome music...but the dance floor was empty...and i felt safe (often on the streets and in crowds i feel like i always have to be "on guard" observing my surroundings, preparing to respond to them - the empty dance floor was none of those things!) - and we danced and danced...and we were silly...and we had fun and we celebrated. it was a great end to the night...a memory i will cherish for a long long time. you see, one of the things i learned about myself in the personality assessment is that it's important for me to create space and time to play...and last night, with some women who i think are absolutely amazing...and who love me fiercely and deeply i got to play and laugh and dance and celebrate.
it was unexpected.
it was unplanned.
it was beautiful.
it is a memory that i will tuck away in my heart and mind for a long long time...
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