a pendulum

sometimes i feel like i'm a pendulum. i know i've mentioned this before, but my life just swings between such extremes here.

today, Karli and i took rozi for a picnic. we were hanging out in her house while she was getting ready, and it was wonderful. i truely love the Katun family - and its hard and sad to imagine that i'll be leaving them so soon. So there i was in this house that would definitely be classified as a "slum house." the roof is plastic tarp. the floor cement and dirt. they have 2 light bulbs, no fans...and 10 people living there....but oh how i love hanging out with them. They're such incredible people - so patient with us, and fun to hang out with...such great smiles. so i sat there watching Rozi do her hair, and get ready...and i suddenly realized that on Saturday i'm going to go shopping for a sari (the typical clothing for indian women). Our language teacher has been invited to a wedding, and we're going along with her. it will be a nice wedding (the family owns a chain of sweet shops)...and a sari is the appropriate clothing. So, i'll go shopping and buy this sari - and when its all said and done, i'll probably spend in one day what they make in a month. even if i buy a cheaper sari (which i'll try to do) i'm sure the Katun's would be shocked by the amount of money that i can just choose to spend at any time.

so my world just swings...between my friends who materially have next to nothing, and my friends who have a nice house with air conditioning and a generator for when the power goes out...between my friends who scrape to make ends meet...and my abundance...and it's hard to be a pendulum....

our time with Rozi was great. we went to a park, and we played games. i have a little travel "Chutes and Ladders" game, and we played "go fish" and "crazy 8's" it was so fun to hang out with her for so long :) And i was thinking today...i want more for Rozi. I want more for her than to just get married and live out the same life her parents did...I want more for the whole family... i want the kids to have a hope, and a bigger picture for their lives than what they see before them. I want them to be whole and healthy - physically, emotionally, socially, and spiritually. i want for them to know Jesus, and His love and provision...i want so much more for the Katuns...and i know i can't give them everything i want for them...and i know i'm not the solution...and i want to be an advocate for the family...but even that, what does that mean...what is provision? what is truely empowering for them? so many questions...and so...often, i pray for my friends the Katuns.